Getting Hitched in Singapore

• Islamic Stance on Marriage
• Selecting the right Partner 
• Eligibility criteria for the couple
• Getting the Wali’s consent
• Preparing the marriage application and submission
• The face-to-face session with Kadi/Naib Kadi
• Declaration with ROMM
• Solemnisation and its principle components

Islamic Stance on Marriage

Marriage is one of the most liked Sunnah in Islam as our beloved Prophet ﷺ himself was married and encouraged others to do so – even going as far as to say those who proclaim a life of abstinence from marriage is not part of his Ummah.

Marriage provides tranquillity, peace and security within people’s hearts. It is a bond not just of love between two people, but rather between two families. It is necessary for making a family and is a source to experience love and happiness as Allah SWT wanted for His servants.

Allah SWT said in Surah Ar-Rum verse 21:

وَمِنْ ءَايَـٰتِهِۦٓ أَنْ خَلَقَ لَكُم مِّنْ أَنفُسِكُمْ أَزْوَٰجًۭا لِّتَسْكُنُوٓا۟ إِلَيْهَا وَجَعَلَ بَيْنَكُم مَّوَدَّةًۭ وَرَحْمَةً ۚ إِنَّ فِى ذَٰلِكَ لَـَٔايَـٰتٍۢ لِّقَوْمٍۢ يَتَفَكَّرُونَ ٢١

Which means: “Among His proofs is that He created for you spouses from among yourselves, in order to have tranquility and contentment with each other, and He placed in your hearts love and care towards your spouses. In this, there are sufficient proofs for people who think.”

The Prophet ﷺ also mentioned that “When a man marries he has fulfilled half of the religion; so let him fear God regarding the remaining half.” [Baihaqi]

Selecting the Right Partner

How do we know if we are selecting the right partner? How can we decide who should be our life partner?

A typical response will be, we select the ones we fall in love with. The Prophet ﷺ highlighted that people choose the ones the want to get married to based on four things: their wealth, their family status, their beauty and their religion. These are the four aspects of a person’s background or character that we tend to fall for and decide if he or she is suitable to be our partner. 

However, in order for us to have a successful marriage, the Prophet ﷺ enjoins that we should select our partner based on their religiosity. This concept of religiosity encompasses a person’s piety, their noble character, and attitude towards life living as servants of Allah. It helps us to strive to be better people with the right partner. One thing we should remember is that, no matter the partner we choose, they may not be the perfect Muslim we envision them to be, thus, it is important to remember that we should strive together as a couple to develop ourselves to become better Muslims.

Eligibility Criteria for the Couple

Naturally, in order for one to be married as a Muslim couple in Singapore, there are certain criteria that have to be met. Besides of course being Muslims, the other criteria to take note of are as follows:

1. If either one of the couple is a Muslim convert, an official permanent conversion certificate from MCAS (Muslim Converts’ Association of Singapore) is required.
2. Consent from the bride’s Wali or lawful guardian must be obtained. The order of those who can become the bride’s Wali is as follows:
   1. Father
   2. Whoever was appointed by the father before his death
   3. Paternal grandfather, or great-grandfather
   4. Sons
   5. Full brother, followed by brothers with the same father
   6. Nephews (from brothers)
   7. Uncles (full brother to father)
   8. Whoever male relative left that is more closely related to the bride
   9. The Muslim leader (or his deputy, usually called a Qadhi) is guardian for any woman who does not have the above stated guardians
3. Both the bride and groom must be at least 21 years of age.
4. You cannot be currently married to anyone else or have any existing marriage application with ROM (Registry of Marriage) or ROMM (Registry of Muslim Marriage).
5. Any previous marriage must be legally dissolved.
6. Divorcees intending to remarry will be required to disclose details of any existing maintenance orders as part of your statutory declarations.

Getting the Wali’s Consent

Having decided upon your partner, you must now ensure that you get the consent of the bride’s Wali first before being able to proceed with the marriage. The Prophet ﷺ mentioned that “There is no marriage except with a Wali (Lawful guardian.)” [Tirmidzi]. The Wali, is the bride’s lawful guardian who is responsible for the bride’s life before getting married. Thus, he has to ensure that the future groom is similarly a person that can be trusted enough to continue to carry on his role of being responsible for the bride’s life after marriage. 

The order of the ones suited to be the Wali was already listed previously. Besides that, there are also certain criteria that must be present for one to be eligible for the role of Wali. Firstly, he must be a Muslim of sound mind and have passed the age of Baligh (puberty). Secondly, the Wali himself must be a legitimate child of his parents, conceived after their marriage in accordance with the Sharia Law.

If the Wali meets all the requirements, then he will be responsible for giving consent to the marriage. When you are applying for the marriage – with his consent – he will then have to provide his personal information for the application, accompanying you to ROMM for the verification of documents and statutory declarations. 

Most importantly, the Wali has to conduct the solemnisation (Aqad Nikah) himself or authorise the Kadi/Naib Kadi to solemnise the marriage. Of course, he will also need to sign the marriage certificate during the solemnisation.

Preparing the marriage application and submission

Having obtained the consent of the Wali, you should now prepare your marriage application and submit it. Decide upon the date, time and place for your solemnisation, the Mahr (Dowry), Hantaran (if any), Kadi/Naib Kadi for the solemnisation ceremony, the Wali’s availability, and the 2 male witnesses for the ceremony.

Once all the above details have been confirmed, you can either head down to the ROMM office to submit the application for marriage, or apply online via the following link: https://www.marriage.gov.sg/login/marriage-application

The face-to-face session with Kadi/Naib Kadi

After submitting the marriage application, you can now book for a face-to-face session with your selected Kadi/Naib Kadi. Besides being responsible for conducting the solemnisation ceremony for the marriage, the Kadi also plays an important role in the life of newlyweds. The Kadi is expected to support a married couple through the first two years of their marriage.

The first session with the Kadi is meant to build up rapport with the couple to help discuss concerns in managing the marriage, be it regarding current or potential challenges the couple may face. The Kadi will be able to help provide tips on how to strengthen the relationship between the couple and refer them to national agencies for additional support if needed.

Booking of a face-to-face meeting with the Kadi can be done on your marriage portal dashboard.

Declaration with ROMM

Even before the solemnisation ceremony itself, you will need to make a statutory declaration with ROMM. You, your partner and the bride’s Wali must all be present for the appointment with your documents to get them verified.

The appointment can be conducted both physically at ROMM’s office, or online via video link. Online verification and declaration will require a Singpass account. For the declaration, you will be required to read and sign a statutory declaration, which is a document where you declare that all the information you have provided in your marriage application is true and correct, and you are both eligible and willing to get married.

Once you have successfully completed the declaration, you may now proceed to prepare for the solemnisation itself.

Solemnisation and its Principle Components

Solemnisation can be carried out either at ROMM itself or at a venue of your choice. Whichever the venue will be, the following components must be present for the solemnisation to be carried out:

1. Groom
2. Bride
3. The Wali (legal guardian)
4. Two male witnesses
5. Aqad Nikah (Ijab & Qabul)
6. Provision of Mahr (Dowry) by groom to the bride

When all the above components are present, the Kadi can then proceed with the solemnisation ceremony itself. First, the Kadi will check the NRICs of the bride, groom, wali and the two witnesses. Then he will ask for the verbal consent of the couple to the marriage. A khutbah on marriage will then be given by the Kadi.

After the khutbah, the Wali will conduct the solemnisation ceremony himself – or authorising the Kadi to conduct it – by offering the hands of the bride to the groom (Ijab), with the groom accepting the offer by the Wali (Qabul). After the Aqad Nikah (solemnisation), the couple will sign two copies of the marriage certificate together with the Kadi, Wali and two witnesses.

The groom will then read the special marriage conditions also known as the Taklik. This involves the groom swearing an oath that if he did not take care of the bride due to certain situations, then he may be divorced.

Having read the Taklik, the Kadi will hand over a coloured copy of the marriage certificate to the bride and groom. The white copies will be returned to ROMM by the Kadi – with your marriage being registered once ROMM receives them. The groom will then hand over the Mahr (Dowry) to the bride and exchange of marriage gifts (if any) will be carried out. 

At the end of the ceremony, the Kadi will close it by reciting prayers for the couple and everyone present. Do not forget to give thanks to your Kadi for facilitating the solemnisation ceremony, and you may invite him to your wedding reception too, though not compulsory.

*several processes and requirements may be changed over time based on the guidelines placed by ROMM.